(CNN) -- You have to think about picking up girls the exact same way you think about picking up a box. It thinks, analyzes and makes excuses, so rejection is self-inflicted before women even get a chance to do it. After working with thousands of men all around the world, I have found that the common issue holding men back with women is that "thing" on top of their shoulders.For the first time in my life, I am actually dating and yes, this entire situation is every bit as disastrous as it sounds. You will feel lonely and miss companionship but the worst thing you can do is rush into something new with someone who simply "fills" your time. The only person that decides how much you are worth is you. Have a platonic guy friend that gives it to you straight.After conquering trials, depression, poverty and obesity, I managed to become a strong, independent fitness model, beauty queen, business professional and published author. Jay, an ex-NFL extremely eligible bachelor is my dating guru. Every time I have a question, he keeps it real with me.I was thrust into a sea of people much more experienced than I am. Before you jump out there again, have a clear understanding of what your standards are. Know the answers to these questions and do not waiver. It's a numbers game, don't waste your time." (Thank you, Jay! Because of this, I was a complete basket case, getting jealous and angry over the smallest things, wanting one thing one day and something completely different the next.I envision myself as the elephant in Tarzan fearfully dipping my toe in the water screaming, "Is this water sanitary? " I know I'm not the only woman out here forced to face the daunting task of "getting back on the saddle," afraid to get hurt, make the wrong move and have to start over. It is so easy to slide back into the comfortability of a long term relationship with someone you just met. Every man is going to push you and test to see how far he can go and what he can get away with. ) Having a guy friend who will tell you the truth is like having a spy on the other side. I've never been called "crazy" in my entire life until that experience and I can't say I disagree with it.But after that, something interesting happens: A man's face shifts according to how he makes a woman feel.A hot man can become hideous, and an average-looking man can become the sexiest guy in the room.
[Read: 25 qualities in a guy that can make him a great boyfriend potential] Relationship tips for single women If you’re having a hard time finding Mr.Nothing works better than taking it easy for the first few weeks.[Read: The Lovepanky dating girl code all girls need to know! Don’t be afraid to let a guy take care of you now and then.Being a single woman in a world full of couples and hitched folks can be rather annoying, especially if you’re looking for the one in all the wrong places.It may even leave you wondering if you’re just unlucky, especially if all your friends seem to be dating somebody who seems perfect.